Destination Desiccation

Las Vegas, Grand Canyon

Have you ever thought to yourself “Why don’t I spend more time sleeping in my car this summer?” Neither have I. And yet somehow that’s basically what we’re doing. 116, 117, 120 degrees — yeah, it’s a dry heat, but it’s devilishly, record-breakingly hot. We’re all dried out and jerkified now.

We’re finding enjoyment, but most moments are consciously loaded with considerations of how to optimize our physical comfort.  The adage “it’s a trip not a vacation” is on speed dial in my brain. It’s hard to extol or appreciate or be patient or admire when you’re acutely uncomfortable. I’m suspecting we’re going to hit our groove at some point, but I’ve felt cranky like I’m doing this all wrong more than I’d like.  All these French and German families traveling these same places seem calm, cool, and collected. What’s their secret? Maybe complaining of discomfort in French and German just sounds better!

Takeaways from the first two stops:

Las Vegas

We used duffels for the translocation from Boston to have compressible luggage once in the campervan, but hot tip — wheeled luggage is easier to haul. We were nearly bested by conveying said luggage through the interminable queuing that is checking into one’s hotel in Las Vegas.

Downtown

We stayed at the Golden Nugget hotel in downtown as a counterpoint to The Strip. Having walked through a goodly number of hotels on The Strip, my impression is that the Golden Nugget has a smaller footprint, which is saying something since it has two enormous towers surrounding an impressive pool with a water slide diving through a shark tank and blinking gambling machines and a handful of restaurants throughout the premises.

I thought the cool thing about the hotel was going to be the Shark Chute, and it was, but the oppressive sun and lack of cabana-free shade limited my use of the pool to the first hour of the day. That was still plenty of time to take in all the butt cheeks on the pool deck, though!

What we ended up digging most about the hotel was its location at the Fremont Street Experience. In 1995, the powers that be erected a domed LED display over several downtown blocks of Fremont Street, creating a hyped up music video pedestrian walkway. It leans so hard into sensory overload that I emerged out the other side a fan. (Didn’t hurt that it provided shade — take that, Cabana Overlords!) I got a kick out of the diverse walks of life sharing the same artificial experience, from stroller babies to Chippendale dancers — the place evinced a Judgment-Free Zone.

A dining highlight was Carson Kitchen downtown. Its trendy small plates, we-bring-everything-to-the-table-as-soon-as-it’s-ready schtick was comfortingly hipster. As much as we resist self-stereotype, if the hipster shoe fits, sometimes you just gotta lace up and walk the walk.

The Strip

After a quick spin through the lavish Bellagio conservatory garden, we walked a long mile to the Venetian for very expensive gelatos, passing through every casino en route to regenerate cooler (yet fleeting) thermospheres. The timing worked for us to do an escape room therein. It was fun to have a collaborative, leaderless activity that each of us enjoyed!

Since this is the trip of a lifetime, we went to Cirque du Soleil’s Ka performance at the MGM Grand. The stage rotates vertically intensifying gravity as an obstacle. From start to finish, my mouth was open, awestruck.  For half our party, the experience was mind blowing. We were transported to another world, fantastically depicted with expertly executed visual illusions. The other half of us were enjoyably entertained, but the tenuous storyline bottlenecked their effusive wonderment.

Escape Campervan

At last, we met our home on wheels for the remainder of the trip, the Del Mar model, brightly painted, geometrically patterned van named Ziggy. We added on the kitchen kit (basic pots, pans, plates, utensils) and bedding kits to the rental and rolled on over to the Super Walmart in Henderson to pick up MORE STUFF. First impressions of Ziggy as a vehicle: the turning radius is wide; it drives noisily but is otherwise a comfortable ride.

Grand Canyon National Park

It took us so long to get out of Walmart that our stop at the Hoover Dam was more cursory than we’d hoped. Kids, look out the window — there’s a dam, big water, power, architectural feat, change of states — welcome to Arizona.

We drove into the night to reach our campsite for the next three nights. We listened for nearly all the 4+ driving hours to one of the most thought-provoking books of my childhood: This Star Shall Abide by Sylvia Engdahl. I’ve never encountered another person who has read this book. It’s sleeper science fiction; the kind of story that explores really big ideas extensively within its constructed premise.  Revisiting it after so many years has been a treat. I still find it compelling, but I concede Georgia’s critique that the writing is stilted and there’s more transcribing of thoughts than actions. Man, is it fun, though, to think about Truth, Equality, Means vs. Ends, all the tent pole concepts coated in a futuristic tale of human survival. I am getting shades of the “Battlestar Galactica” remake, which I also loved for the same reasons.

Desert View Campground

We pulled into the eastern most campground of the Park, Desert View, well after dark and struggled through setting up our beds for the first time. The roof of the van elevates mechanically to reveal a full-sized foam mattress surrounded by screened windows where the kids clamber up to sleep. With cross ventilation, it is reasonably comfortable. Behind the bench seat where the kids sit when we’re driving is enough space to extend a shelf and spread out a queen-sized foam cushion for Dan and me. One glaring problem with this set up is that other than the driver and passenger windows up front, campervans do not have windows that open and close. So, Dan and I experience stifling conditions in the back.  Opening the big side and rear doors assists with ventilation, but it also welcomes innumerable flitting insects that drove us temporarily insane the first night. I am now on the hunt for additional battery-powered fans to help us through the night. We are either going to acclimate to this situation or go back to Walmart and buy a freaking screen tent for the two of us to sleep in. Stay tuned!

The good news is that we scored Campsite 46, which the campground hosts admitted to being their favorite. I can see why. It is a two-minute walk behind our site to the rim and a feeling that the grandness of the canyon is private. Imagine beholding the Grand Canyon without another visible soul.

The next morning we set off for caffeine and information. It is only this spring that all four of us have become bike riders, and the notion that we might ride bikes along the rim of the Grand Canyon is so newly formed that it calls for celebration in and of itself. We did it! At 7,000-feet elevation, mid-day, with excessive heat warning signs plastered everywhere, the three-mile loop took us well over two hours. We returned to the campground wiped out but rallied to attend a ranger talk about ravens just as the sun set below the northern rim. Golden hour indeed!

Next day, we rose early enough to drive 45 minutes west to hike two miles of the Bright Angel Trail. We were counseled to start our hike at 7am in order to make it back to the rim and predictable shade and water sources before 10am. It was exhausting going, but I’m so glad we got a collective taste of the descent. Georgia is determined to hike down South Kaibab, camp near Phantom Ranch, and climb out Brighton Angel as soon as she’s old enough to do so without her parents. Any takers? Abie persevered admirably but endorsed a lot of struggles with exertion at altitude. That said, I did notice an energetic spring in his step when I mentioned Oreos at one point.

Other highlights included an early lunch in the cool El Tovar lounge with big picture windows overlooking the canyon, coin-operated showers near the Mather campground, the superb informational movies at the main Visitor Center, and Dan’s perfected aglia e olio for dinner back at the site.

With one park down, and 15 more to go, this is definitely a trip. We keep running errands, buying more ice, and strategizing water utilization. Lake George camping seems positively luxurious in comparison. What we’re missing is space to retreat to in comfort. All of the comfortable seating we’ve found when we’re not driving has been paid for (e.g., restaurant, show, hotel). We’re gonna have to work on creating down time where we can each do our own thing for a bit. That is going to be key to savoring the special moments we’ve had and will continue to have.

Tl;dr

*Summer is hot — what are we to do? Stay inside, retreat to the Arctic?

*Las Vegas is overstimulating, but in good ways, too.

*Walmart is overstimulating, but in no perceivably good ways.

*We’re grateful for our friends who are sources of brilliant ideas like Ka, campervan shopping lists, and biking at the Canyon!

*The Del Mar Escape Campervan is efficiently outfitted, but somebody’s gotta innovate screened windows!

*The Grand Canyon is huge — not just the mile down, but the distance east to west. There’s a lot of driving to be done within the Park.

NB: the rangers omit the article before Grand Canyon referring to it like you would an acquaintance— think Ukraine, not the Ukraine. I noticed the same thing at CDC and FDA. Insiders refer to them without the article.